No Way To Treat a Genius
It’s 1990 and I'm at a Tears For Fears après gig backstage party somewhere in LA. It’s about 11pm, it’s incredibly crowded and full of appalling record company people. I'm sitting at a table getting quietly pissed with Will Gregory.
Earlier in the day, on the journey to LA, the petrifying boredom of the tour bus had been interrupted by Roland Orzablal who said, to no one in particular,
“Wow, have you seen tonight’s guest list?”
He was running his finger down the list.
“Dr Jacob Janov, Debbie Harry, Brian Wilson…..”
“Brian Wilson!” I shouted, braking off from my game of scrabble.
“Will he get an ‘access all areas’?”
“ I bloody well hope not.”
“What d’you mean, wouldn’t you like to meet him? He’s an bonifide genius,”
”They could probably tell by my reaction that I was a fan. However I could tell by everyone else’s laughter and derogatory comments that they thought he was a bit of a joke. I got rather angry. My high horse wandered in and I climbed on.
“That man,” I said raising myself up, “is a genius. You’re too young to appreciate what he achieved in the 60’s or just how revolutionary he was.”
"He's a fucking nutter, he turned up last time we played here and we had to meet him.”
"God, I'd love to talk to him", I said.
"Well, you’re welcome to."
"I'd consider it an honour." I said rather pompously.
Hours later, having forgotten all about this conversation, as I mentioned earlier, I'm sitting at a table getting quietly pissed with Will Gregory when I notice 3 figures slowly making their way towards us through the throng. I can see that one of them is Curt Smith but I don’t recognize the guy on the left or the one in the middle - bloody hell it’s Brian Wilson!
They come up to our table. I have time to register that Brian looks tired and drawn. The other guy looks weird. Like a TV evangelist, orange skin, a rictus smile - very scary! He has his hand clamped to Brian's shoulder. (This is the guy who I later find out is his mentor, his manager, psychiatrist and all round best mate.)
"Brian, this is our keyboard player Andy – he’s always wanted to meet you," says Curt.
Whaaa........ I'm not prepared for this. I staggered to my feet. Brian grabbed my hand with both of his and squeezed gently. I said something utterly banal like,
"I've always admired your work".
“Thank you, that’s really nice,” said Brian.
“Are you writing any new stuff?”
I noticed he had a peculiarly vacant stare. Like a pair of eyes seeing for the first time. I decided to ask him about about Surf's Up, which was in the news right then. He sparked to life and we chatted for maybe 10 mins about his recording techniques. He wandered off the subject from time to time but mostly he was talking normally albeit with that unnerving stare. Then the orange bloke looked at his watch and the squeezed Brian’s shoulder. Then, as if flicking on a switch, Brian rose unsteadily from his seat.
Then he leaned down and wispered in my ear;
"Humour," he said. “That’s what I’m interested in now.” Then, "Humour - that's what keeps me going".
I must have looked rather non-plussed.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small tape recorder.
"Every morning I wake up and switch on this tape player", he said.
"Then I tell a joke into it.
Then I wait a coupla minutes ….. ….just a coupla minutes.............................
then I play it back.......................................................................
and MAN do I laugh!" A beatific smile spread over his face.
“Really,” I said, “that’s nice.”
There was another awkward silence.
It didn’t last long - the psychiatrist, rather impatient by now, patted him on the shoulder and said,
"Brian, I think it's time we were going now".
Brian shook my hand again and turned on his heel and they melted back into the crowd. I was left to reflect on my meeting with one of the true geniuses of pop music.
This is a sad story and one that some smart-arsed music journalist could have a good laugh about. That’s why it was so good to see that about 14 years later a rejuvenated Brian Wilson was back on stage performing so brilliantly.